MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/related; boundary="----=_NextPart_01C6A8F4.59171790" This document is a Single File Web Page, also known as a Web Archive file. If you are seeing this message, your browser or editor doesn't support Web Archive files. Please download a browser that supports Web Archive, such as Microsoft Internet Explorer. ------=_NextPart_01C6A8F4.59171790 Content-Location: file:///C:/4953DD04/TunnelRatTed.htm Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Content-Type: text/html; charset="us-ascii" The Memoirs of Sam Renier: Maneater Mount: Showdown with Tunnel Rat = Ted

The Memoirs of Sam= Renier<= /h1>

Chapter 27: Showdo= wn with Tunnel Rat Ted

September 13, 196= 8. It was as hot as candle wax, and it was drizzling for the past six days -- you could drown frogs in this weather. But it was just another week in the life= for BravoDelta Group. The green-headed flies were l= ike vampires outta some crap horror flick, 'cept they didn't fear man, sunlight, or fire. Corporal Pablo O'Riley caught a coupla constrictor snakes, so we got something better than MREs for breakfast. Had to use napa= lm ta start the cookin' fire= . Hated to waste the napalm when there's so many VC kids ta spray it on!

 

CenComm sent us orders ove= r the wireless. Goddamned armchair generals! They haven't opened a door for themselves in twenty years, but they're tryin' = ta run a war outta Washington while worryin' more about keeping the editorial= staff of the NY Times appeased than they are fryin' V= C. The message was the same old crap: Looks like Shoeshine Charlie faked his own d= eath last month and reconned with another VC scum na= med Tunnel Rat Ted. Assholes! You'd think six bullets in the belly would be eno= ugh for Charlie, but I've got a seventh with his initials carved on it! Yessuh!

To add insult to injury, the brass sent us another U.N. Observer to spy on us. Don't give me= none of that "human rights violations" crap = when we've got a JOB to do! Or maybe the "observer" wasn't too well li= ked at the U.N. -- after all, they don't exactly have a long life expectancy wi= th BravoDelta!

 

The Tunnel Grid is enough to make the Army types wet themselves with fear. But no VC underground deathtrap filled with pungi sticks, mines, poison gas and tripwires can sca= re BravoDelta! No way! We're Marines, goddamnit!

 

We got to Tunnel 213, and the goddamned VC's were dres= sed like scarecrows with anorexia. But then, most scarecrows don't have AK47s! = If communism was so damned special, then how come all the guerrilla fighters always looked like starving waifs? They opened fire and shot Palbo O'Riley and Colin R= odriguez right in the chest! Damn VC! The swooped down from the trees on bungie cords and fell from the sky like black rain. T= here must have been a hundred of them and only 14 of us. I hate to give the VC s= uch unfair odds -- for them, that is!

 

We unleashed the fires of hell against them -- full au= to from twelve of my men, plus two flame throwers, and five grenade launchers. Shoeshine Charlie took a rocket in the chest and erupted in flame. He did t= he dance o' death, two-step! Huzzah! The cadence of machine gun fire is a beat= BravoDelta can get down to!

 

Tunnel Rat Ted came at me with whirling knives screamin' about his godless commie vengeance. Goddamn maniac was going on full afterburners, high on cocaine --  his pupils looked like train tunnels! But only a fool brings a knife= to a gunfight, and he looked pretty foolish without a head after I finished shooting it off with a rocket-propelled grenade!

 

We filled Tunnel 213 with kerosene and set it ablaze. = The howl of the three-dozen VC  below ground wa= s like a chorus of demons -- ahh the smell of burning = flesh in the morning. Smells like Victory!!

 

Our new U.N. Observer called me a "butcher" = and was going to report my "war crimes" to some bleeding heart sonofabitch named Kerry John or something stupid like= that -- Godamned commie. Probably a  Frenchie who reads the Washington Post like it= was the Bible!

 

Spies don't last long in BravoDel= ta Group, and "Observers" tend ta catch bullets if ya get my drift.

 

Semper Fi, baby!

 

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